• 15Jun
    Categories: Grieving Comments Off on Hope

    I mourned my (or my kid’s) loss again this morning, but was reminded of something that no other religion can give me, . . hope.

    Where is your hope today?

    Do you have hope in your future? It Will end.
    Do you have hope in yourself? You Will fail.
    Do you have hope in a friend? They will let you down.
    Do you have hope in a spouse? You already know how that works.

    My hope is in someone so out of this world that when this world erupts in total chaos I can still have peace. My hope lasts forever. My hope will never fail. My hope is beyond Your understanding. Will you give me the opportunity to share my hope?

  • 04Jun
    Categories: Musings Comments: 1

    =) I had another dream.  I think it seems kind of silly to put much stock in dreams, but it was just a little bit of encouragement and I decided to hang on to it anyway.

    We had been separated (the hazy dream world sorta crammed 6 years into about 2 or 3 days) and my anticipation was mounting.  We were to meet in the auditorium and he had sent a short note that simply said, “I’ll find you.”  My excitement was such that of course I was ready early and I decided to go and wander around a bit.  The auditorium was packed and people were milling around everywhere.  It reminded me of college days before a church service.  I started at one side and meandered my way toward the other side constantly scanning the people around me, looking for friends, watching people interacting with each other, and hoping to see him.

    I was three quarters of the way to the other side when I heard my name called.  My heart jumped.  Several rows above me a group of friends waved me in their direction and then I saw him.  I didn’t recognize him.  He looked different.  He wasn’t Dan.  But the smile on his face, the recognition in his eyes, his speed as he headed in my direction, all pushed me toward him without hesitation.  We reached each other and he pulled me into a hug that I knew.  I knew those arms that surrounded and held me close.  I knew that heart that was beating in my ear.  I knew the tone of his voice as he whispered how much he missed me.  I knew what his response would be to my sarcastic comment of “Of course, it’s only been two days!” 

    Sigh.  I miss those hugs.

    But what I really want to grab on to is the fact that HE Is Looking.  God is looking for me.  God is looking for those I love.  The pressure and responsibility for me to lead my children to the Lord is not mine.  GOD is looking for my children, and I know He will find them.  I, of course, will do my best to love and direct them in the right direction, but ultimately the choice is up to them.

    And of course, there is the side note that maybe Mr. Right is looking for me, too.  =)