Had another disturbing phone call the other day. Just a reminder of my loss and a smack of reality. It’s easier when I just pretend that it never happened. Somehow all these kids just appeared out of thin air and my life consists of only the present. I don’t understand why people wouldn’t want there to be a ‘Creator’ that they can dump all their problems on and just keep going. Why would you want to carry everything yourself? If I have to do all the cleaning . . yeah, it gets done to my specifications, but think of all the fun I could be having instead if I let the kids help get the work done (or hire someone =)
Another reality smack occurred when I stood on our front porch and waved goodbye to my boys as they headed off for their ‘first’ day of work. They are getting older. They aren’t babies any more, and if I’m smart I’ll learn how to let go before they ask. Sigh.