• 26Nov
    Categories: Grieving Comments: 4

    It’s midnight again and I am waging a war.  Rage and frustration, grouchiness and loneliness, depression and grief are all roiling around, bubbling over, and spitting out a sticky black goo that melts into and absorbs everything it touches.

    Some would say that I am an innocent.  How can I not be with my simplistic view that I can be happy and trust my God to handle and direct my life in a loving manner? 

    I object.  I don’t have to be exposed to all the dirty little secrets this world holds to know that the life we are living is less than perfect.  I am being faced with it again and again, day after day, as I try to come to grips with the fact that my “perfect” life has been shattered by the filthiness of sin and corruption.  I had a taste of what God intended in the Garden of Eden and like Adam and Eve I feel as if I have been thrust out of a place of beauty where everything makes sense, into a dreary world of loneliness and confusion.

4 Comments to Rage and Confusion

  • Dear Liisa,
    And yet the God of love and mercy was still there for Adam and Eve. He did not leave them hopeless that day, but gave them the promise of a Savior who would redeem the world and crush Satan. Everything changed that day when sin entered this world – except God. He is the same – and He always will be. So just as Adam and Eve had beautiful fellowship in the garden, God made a way for you and I to also have beautiful fellowship with Him. Psalm 16:11 – Thou wilt show me the path of life: in Thy presence there is fulness of joy; at Thy right hand there are pleasures forevermore.” This promise is not only for the future – it is for the here and now as you cast all your care upon Him. So don’t fight Him – but rest in Him. He loves you with an amazing love that you cannot comprehend totally in your humanity, but you can rejoice in it, and rest in it – even when it hurts. You are His child and He will not forsake you or stop caring for you. So be like the wounded child who runs to mom for comfort. Don’t run from God – run TO Him – His arms are wide open. Joshua 1:9 – “Have I not commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afaid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee withersoever thou goest.” I love you and I am praying for you.

  • Janet knows what it is to fight spiritual battles and come out the victor. We prayed for her during her struggles and we are praying with you in yours. We are each “in Christ” and He is the Victor. An old hymn said, “Ask the S avior to guide you, comfort, strengthen and keep you. He is willing to aid you. He will carry you through.” I can’t remember the title, but as I prayed for you, these words kept coming to my mind, so I share them with you.
    Love and prayer,
    Wentworth and Doloris Pike

  • Always remember, sweet Liisa, that although the world we are thrust into is a world of confussion, God is not the God of confussion, but order. He will show you the order for your life. Rest in Him and He will show you all that He has waiting for you. As you rise to each occation He will pour order into the confussion and wash it all away one day at a time. Love and prayers

  • I read your words, and I read your commenters words. And I am struck by the amazing way that God has designed His body to work. We are one body in Christ, and if one member is hit by devastating pain, we are all hit. Don’t forsake your fellow believers, and don’t stop being completely honest. A lesson for myself, more than anything.

    We love you, Liisa, and Jeremy and I are still holding you up in prayer every day.