• 07May

    We have had some help from New York this week.  It’s been great.  They are making inroads on the house, helping lots with the kids, cooking some meals, and keeping us all entertained.

    We have the electrical done upstairs, all the covers are on the receptacles and light switches, lights and smoke alarms installed, everything is painted, carpets are laid in the boy’s rooms, linoleum laid down in the kid’s bathroom and laundry room, trim work (all donated again- THANK YOU!) is being installed . . . .

    We have the carpet for the girl’s room, the hallway and the linoleum for the master bath to do yet.  I need to pick something out for the master bedroom yet.  Then we have the rest of the trim work, touch up on paint, and closet doors and rods to install.  Bathroom vanities are ordered and on their way and then we need to get the plumber to hook up fixtures and the upstairs will be about done.

    They have been mudding the downstairs this week and Lord willing, we will be able to start painting down there next week.  The kitchen cabinets have also been ordered, lights are ready to install, and doors are all here.  I still need to make some decisions on flooring down there and I need to pick out some appliances as well.  The siding is scheduled for the end of next week as well.

    The well is ready to be hooked up.  We are fighting with the telephone company to get them to come hook that up.  Electrical guys called and said they would come hook that up (sometime).  The sewer system is still on hold.  And we are still trying to get an oil furnace for the heating system.

    Things still seem to be moving along at a nice pace although we are doing more of the less visible stuff.  I would love to give you a move in date but it remains to be seen as to whether we will have enough to complete this project so that the inspectors will let us move in, or whether we will have to play around at it for a while as we can afford it.  So many have helped to get us this far that I find it difficult to believe that the Lord would let us down this late in the game.  But His plans are not our own.

  • 07May

    5-6-09

    My glasses broke.  I have had this happen to me before so it wasn’t something that I panicked over, but it was terribly inconvienent.  I was supposed to be picking out colors for carpets, matching them to walls, looking at linoleum, finding styles I liked, etc.  It’s difficult to do that when you have to hold the rug up to your nose to see it.

    Anyway, I took the glasses to Wal-Mart for a repair job only to find out they don’t do soldering.  They sent me to a jewelry store.  I’m thinking, “Oh great.  Here we go.”

    However, the Lord had another blessing in store for me.  Caleb (baby) was with me and I took him along in with me.  The people that owned the store were very friendly and helpful.  They thought Caleb was wonderful (a perfect way to get a mommy to think you are wonderful people) and wanted the chance to hold him.  I didn’t have a problem with that and we spent some time chatting and playing with baby.  Somehow they found out about Dan and all my kids.  My wallet wasn’t exactly updated on pictures yet, but I had a family photo from when Maranatha (2) was a baby.  So they got to see how cute my bunch is, and how young.  =)  

    When it was time to go, I’d had a relaxing conversation, my glasses were fixed, guaranteed not to break in the same spot, and they refused to charge me as well!  It made me cry.  Another couple that didn’t really know me from Adam, that were touched, and led of the Lord to sacrifice a bit on my behalf.  This whole situation is doing much to “renew my faith in humanity” and reminds me again and again of the Lord’s omnipotence.  God is faithful.

  • 05May
    Categories: Grieving Comments: 5

    I was still trying to figure out that “emptiness” that I mentioned in a previous blog and Sunday night I had a thought.  I was listening to “Find Us Faithful” sung by Steve Green and the words reminded me of all the “hopes and dreams” that Dan and I had, and I thought, “That’s what’s missing!”  My purpose in life, my hopes, my dreams, my ideas about what the future should hold are all gone.  I’m starting all over again.  I don’t know that I’ve had dreams for my children, other than that they have a strong relationship with my Lord and grow up to be good solid citizens and a faithful witness.  Technically they can do that without me, although I’m sure it would be easier if at least one of their parents stuck around.  So essentially I am wandering around a bit aimlessly trying to figure out new goals for my life so that I know which directions to take.

    Currently the only real goals and purpose I seem to have is to get done and move into that house.  The Bible says, “Where there is no vision the people perish”.  Hitler used to drive people mad in the concentration camps by making them carry sand from one side of the camp to the other – no purpose to the task.  Soldiers imprisoned survive because they have people at home waiting for them.  Me, I’m still going because I have my kids, but I need/want something more than that.

    Then my thoughts turned a bit more to spiritual things.  Why is it so important to live a Christian life?  Why do I need to trust my Lord?  Why does it matter if I let depression over take me?  And from somewhere the answer crept into my consciousness.  My life is a witness, a tool to bring others to Jesus. 

    I tend to focus more on strengthening people’s relationship with the Lord as that is where my gifts seem to lie, and frankly while that is important in the over all scheme of things it didn’t seem to matter since “they” were already on their way to heaven.  But that’s not true either.  My life may influence someone who in turn will lead someone else to salvation.  And while my life may serve as a witness, my gifts are still needed.  I do still have purpose and meaning.  God’s not finished with me yet.

  • 02May

    We got the upstairs painted!!  There were about 20 volunteers helping today and they made quick work of all that .  It’s exciting to see the progress being made.  I think I’m going to love that laundry room.  I’ll try to get pictures out soon.

  • 02May
    Categories: Grieving Comments: 5

    5-1-09

    It has been a rough week for me emotionally.  I have been struggling with an emptiness, a vagueness that makes it difficult to understand life as a whole.  I’ve spent the better part of two days trying to come up with the words to try to explain it to you.

    I can remember getting up in the morning, especially in the spring, and being excited about what the day had in store for me.  I can remember feeling peace and contentment with my life.  I can remember the rewarding feeling of service – being able to help someone and seeing the gratitude in their eyes or at least just knowing that you did the right thing.  I can remember a determination to beat Satan at his games – a desire to win the battles.  I remember a zest for life,  I can remember feeling emotion at the thought of cleaning the bathroom AGAIN.

    The best way to explain the emotions of the last few days is to tell you that I didn’t feel any of that.  I was just empty.