• 02May
    Categories: Grieving Comments: 5

    5-1-09

    It has been a rough week for me emotionally.  I have been struggling with an emptiness, a vagueness that makes it difficult to understand life as a whole.  I’ve spent the better part of two days trying to come up with the words to try to explain it to you.

    I can remember getting up in the morning, especially in the spring, and being excited about what the day had in store for me.  I can remember feeling peace and contentment with my life.  I can remember the rewarding feeling of service – being able to help someone and seeing the gratitude in their eyes or at least just knowing that you did the right thing.  I can remember a determination to beat Satan at his games – a desire to win the battles.  I remember a zest for life,  I can remember feeling emotion at the thought of cleaning the bathroom AGAIN.

    The best way to explain the emotions of the last few days is to tell you that I didn’t feel any of that.  I was just empty.

5 Comments to Emotionless

  • In my reading this morning, I read Psalm 34:18 — the Lord is close to the broken hearted… I thought of you. Know that i am praying for you.

  • “My Child, when you saw only one set of footprints, that’s when I was carrying you.—The Lord ~~~ Footprints in the Sand

  • Just a little reminder…..

    Does Jesus care when my heart is pained…
    Too deeply for mirth and song?
    And the burdens press, and the cares distress?
    And the way grows weary and long?

    Oh yes, He cares, I KNOW HE CARES,
    His heart is touched with your grief…
    When you feel dismayed,
    He will come to your aid!
    I KNOW YOUR SAVIOUR CARES!!

  • Liisa,
    We prayed for you in our prayer group last night. God will give you peace.

    Love, Suanna

  • I remember well the dark days when there seemed to be no good reason to go on. Or at least that is what I saw my mom struggle with. I was six, but knew life would never be the same. Some days I felt like I should not feel happy if mommy couldn’t, but with time she found the happy again and all was well. The same, never, but well. The empty feelings help the pain not feel so deep till we can face it head on again. The sun will shine in your heart again and the joy of a spring morning will return, oh yes and the bathroom will be waiting too. Just remember that joy and contentment are not the same as happy. I often forget that and think joy is gone when only the happy is gone for a day or so.

    We love you and will say extra prayers for you today.