• 06Apr

    The words are not coming easy tonight.  There is much to share, I am just too worn out to formulate the words needed to convey the thoughts and emotions that I am dealing with. 

    I ate supper alone tonight.  I hate eating alone.  Usually I avoid the feeling of eating alone by eating while standing (also makes it easier to keep an eye on kids), or eating on the run.  Tonight staying upright seems to be an issue.

    Caleb is eating cereal at three months.  The doc’s recommend waiting till 6 mo, I tend to think the mother knows best and most of my kids were eating by 4 months, but Caleb is DEMANDING cereal.  He’s not supposed to be that big!  I am afraid that I must not be providing enough nutrition for the both of us, hence the desire for real food (if you can call that rice stuff “real”).  Don’t know if there are some feelings of guilt there that I’m fighting or if I am just too tired . . .

    But anyway, I need to move on to other things so I guess I will need save some of my other thoughts for later.