• 17Jan

    I had a moment of joy today and I grabbed it and sang and danced.  It was refreshing, relieving, and encouraging, to have that little bit of joy and energy flowing through my veins.  But where did it go?  I feel so lost and confused.  The littlest of things can throw me off.  Not having any idea what to make for supper can be enough to make me want to run and hide.  Looking at the toys scattered all over the floor is enough to send me into tears.  Making a decision about what color socks to wear while listening to two or three different things from my kids (that all, of course, demand immediate answers) is enough to cause me to doubt my sanity.  Where is that inner strength and calm I used to have?  Did I rely on Dan so much or is it just the emotional turmoil of the situation?

3 Comments to A moment

  • Sweet Liisa, I think it may be both. I’m sure you relied a great deal on Dan, but please realize that that’s a good thing. After all, he was your husband which made him your leader, because I can tell you had a Godly marriage in which you looked up to him. On the other hand, his death is still so fresh, & no one expects you to be on some grief time table in which you’re supposed to reach a certain day & suddenly not feel any pain in his no longer being with you. You have every right to grieve whenever you need to, always. Just remember that Jesus is carying you through these difficult moments, even if you can’t always see him; He IS with you, & He’ll NEVER leave you. Rest in that. Well, I hope this helps a little.
    More prayers for you & lots of love,
    I Peter 5:7; Matt. 11:28-30

  • Don’t forget the moments. They will become hours, and days, then weeks and before you know it months. You will never forget but your remembering will not hurt so much. You will also find a schedule and all the little things that come with it, like making supper, will become easy again. Remember Grief takes time. Don’t rush it or you won’t finish well, don’t prolong it or you will get trapped. I know you will know when to do each as you are an amazing woman. I love you and I care and I wish I could just sit and listen til you had talked all your hurts away. Auntie Joanne