Heard a couple of messages today on parenting.
If Dan were here we would be having an intense conversation right now (probably while I scoured the kitchen) on our goals for our kids, how we want to raise them, where we want them to be in 20 years, etc. with all kinds of rabbit trails thrown in just to keep things interesting. I can feel the passion inside just itching to be verbalized. Unfortunately I’m not real comfortable talking to my teddy bears. Might be good practice, though.
Anyway, rather than ignoring it all and trying (emphasis on trying) to sleep I’m going to write. Usually when I write it tends to be more cohesive and easier to understand, so this could be an improvement.
The first message I heard was encouraging us as parents to have faith in God and let go of our children. So far, so good. I could use a little ‘letting go’ about now. =) We all got sick this weekend and I think the kids are getting tired of playing with each other, but Mom’s not willing to let them go out and contaminate other children.
The second message reminded me that “. . all things work together for good. . to them who are the called according to his purpose. . .to be conformed to the image of His Son . . .” and continued to explain that our purpose was to be more like God. All that “good stuff” is good because it makes us more like Christ. We may look at our circumstances and say, “How in the world could this be ‘good’?!” But if our circumstances draw us closer to Christ and make us more like Him, then how can they be bad?
But what really got me going was the need for parents to have goals for their children. I was aware of that. I even knew that having goals that we agreed on created a unity in our marriage relationship as well as our parenting techniques. What I am now realizing is that Dan and I never had to verbalize our goals. I’m not even sure I would know how or where to start in verbalizing what I want for my children.
There have been a few things lately that have really gotten me thinking about dating again. I enjoyed dating Dan. I am something of a flirt and I always felt secure enough in my few relationships that fear rarely entered the picture. So the idea of dating again has appeal to me. But there is a MAJOR difference this time. I’m still young, still fairly skinny, not quite as energetic, but definitely not using a cane yet, not real hard to get along with, and I’m guessing that it wouldn’t be too hard for me to snag a guy somewhere along the line. . . Except . . I have 7 children. Not only does that tend to scare guys away it also means I need to be twice as choosy as to who I bring into my life.
How do I communicate to someone what my goals are for my children so that we can work from the same page if I’m not really sure what those goals are?
And the thought comes nudging, “Don’t look for the perfect mate, Be the perfect mate.” Somehow I think Pastor Schettler said it better than that. And I’m also reminded not to run ahead of God. So smack, bang, tamp, tamp, smush down that excitement and PLEASE wait for God’s timing. You know things always work better His way.
So with all that said, I think I will have to try to write up a list of goals for my kids and put it somewhere safe.
